One of John's specialties is working with couples. He enjoys helping couples deepen their ability to communicate honestly and lovingly, and learn the tools that make sustaining a love relationship possible. Being in relationship is an interesting intersection of individual and partner issues. We must learn to respect and appreciate the individual, while also embracing the healing power of a relationship to help each person grow and mature. John believes that by "tasting" the full potential of a relationship, one becomes clearer as to the role of that relationship in one's life.

  John's focus in relationship work is to deepen the trust and safety of each person and of the relationship--to help build a foundation two people can use to discover the truth of how they want to be with each other. Sessions generally focus on positive movement forward, rather than re-hashing arguments. He supports you in learning tools you can use at home to improve your fulfillment with each other, and in yourself as a person. Honoring differences, and learning how to merge gracefully, are things that most people need some training in. Most couples can benefit from having such support, even if the relationship is doing well.

  Individuals and couples come to Energy Healing for a variety of reasons. Sometimes, they have a spiritual bent, or prefer a more holistic approach to their problems. Other times, they have tried more traditional therapies and want to try something different. Perhaps previous attempts at change and growth did not go deep enough, or they want a more heart-centered way. The most common reason folks come to John, however, is that they have been referred by friends or family who have experienced the benefits of his approach to couples work.

Training

  John has extensive training in relationship work, including in some of the most current research-based models. He has studied the energetic and spiritual dynamics present between two partners with Dr. Robert Jaffe, M.D. The energy moving between two partners that is unspoken, as well as how it is being received or not received, plays a large role in determining partner interactions and intimacy. John is familiar with popular professional models such as the work of John Gottman and Sue Johnson's Emotionally Focused Therapy, and like Johnson, believes that emotional interaction lies at the heart of a healthy relationship. John is trained in Gottman method couples therapy, one of the most respected and well-researched approaches to couples work. John actively trains with Dr. Stan Tatkin of the UCLA School of Medicine, author of Love and War in Intimate Relationships and one of the top couples therapists in the world. Part of the UCLA research group that includes Dr. Allan Schore and Dan Siegel, M.D., Dr. Tatkin is pioneering the application of neurobiologically-based attachment work to couples. With Dr. Tatkin, Allan Schore, and others, John studies adult attachment and interpersonal neurobiology, the cutting edge of research in psychology as it is being applied to couples work.

Interpersonal Neurobiology

  Interpersonal Neurobiology is a growing field built on the marriage of applied adult attachment and affective neuroscience. It is being pioneered by cutting edge research by Drs. Siegel, Schore, Panksepp, Porges, Ogden, Tatkin, Fosha and others. Interpersonal neurobiology offers us a window through which to examine what partners are doing with each other at an implicit level. That is to say, sometimes the way we react instinctively to our partners matters more than our rational thoughts about those interactions. What is our nervous system doing? How about our emotional memory system? In close interactions, we often react before we think. So exploring the implicit level of partner interactions is key to resolving any unpleasant dynamics. Applying neuroscience to couples work also allows us a healthy sense of humor about couples interactions. We often do what we do without really meaning to intentionally. Helping partners manage each other, understand one another, and function as a cohesive unit is the goal of this application in couples work.